… and I never quite get around to doing them.

Fuck. This. Shit.

This year, I make a list and I fucking clear it by the time I’m 30. There is no sense in living if you aren’t having way over the top fun with it.

Also making a list, publicly posting it and putting a deadline on it is a sure fire way to have a really really really really crappy 30th birthday when you inevitably realise that you’ve done way too few of these things and have just run out of soup.

1. Bungee jump
2. Canyoning
3. Solo sky dive from plane
4. BASE jump the fjords
5. Flying suit BASE jump the fjords
6. Jump off a few other things with a flying suit
7. Climb Triglav
8. Climb Everest
9. Drive at least one official european rally race
10. Drive and finish the desert oldsmobile rally (I keep forgetting the name)
11. Ride the trans-siberian railway
12. Learn to do a no handed endo
13. Perform a double tailwhip with a mountain bike
14. Come to a board meeting with a parachute through the window

Noticed a pattern?

Well I’ve got 8 (although I like to pretend it’s 9) years to do all of this. Will happily take suggestions for things I haven’t thought of.

EDIT:

Oh and 15: Learn to ride a unicycle

Myth: There is time

Reality: You have less time now than you have ever had. You have less time now than you had an hour ago. You are nearer to your death than you have ever been. Plan thoroughly, but don’t wait too long before taking action.

And then when you remember that Steve Jobs had a speech devoted almost completely to this notion of memento mori.

Hell, the Romans came up with the whole memento mori crap far far ago … I forget how the tradition went, but they used to punch winning generals in the face or something … or was it that a slave was following them through the whole festivity whispering “memento mori” in their ear. Something like that.

Then there’s that tradition in greek weedings (judging from Big Fat Greek Wedding) where the bride is thrown off her chair – just to remind her she’s mortal too.

And way back when some smart poetry geek came up with the idea of Carpe Diem (later transformed to Carpe Noctem and Carpe Pijem, the slovene version). Again basically the same concept!

Then there’s an interesting story I read on a forum once, it happened to a forumite’s cousin or somesuch:

She was a lass, around 23 years of age. Two lovely children, a loving husband, nice house and so on. One day they have a fight over something extremely mundane and boring. She gets pissed off and storms out of the house … only to be mowed down by a truck.

To death.

So yeah, I know as humans we like to think we’re something special, that each and everyone of us is a special little snowflake unique and wonderful in their own right.

Well you’re not. You too will die, today, tomorrow, in an hour, it doesn’t matter.

And nothing of value will be lost!

Nothing!

Nobody will care, absolutely nobody.

I think people often forget these things and spend their whole lives doing boring shit they don’t care about. Stop that!

For the end, a quote from Anthony de Mello:

Most people, even though they don’t know it, are asleep. They’re born asleep, they marry in their sleep, they breed children in their sleep, they die in their sleep without ever waking up

But that just brings to mind this:

I dunno, just remember that whatever you do, all your life, you’re on the verge of imminent death. Never forget.

And thus the three day easter weekend is behind us.

Finally.

Was getting a bit long to be honest.

But what’s more important than this is what I spent most of my weekend doing –> Videogames and piles upon piles of omnom yummy foods. Mostly junk foods like bits of smoked pigs and copious amounts of chocolate … very little eggs though, that’s a bit silly considering easter is supposed to be all about eggs.

No matter, food was omnom.

Now, how can a guy justify wasting so many hours on something as simple as videogames? Well, I could say I was trying to have fun … but that’s a cop out, way too easy.

The most importantest thing is the mechanics of my adventures. The game I was playing was Richard Burns Rally, known far and wide as being one of the most, if not the most, difficult and realistic rally simulation games. The map I was playing was Mineshaft from Australia, in my humble opinion the hardest fucking map in the whole game.

See in most of the maps you drive in some forrest or something and the worst that can happen is you ram a tree or lose time by going a bit wide and over some grass or something.

But Mineshaft is different. Most of that damn thing is comprised of a road with a sheer drop cliff on one side and a cliff on the other. It’s a bit like trying to rally over the Yungas Road (most dangerous road in the world FYI).

So what the fuck are you rambling about Swizec. Just get on with the fucking point already sheesh!

Alright alright.

My point is that ALL I did. For SEVERAL fucking hours. Was. Play. Richard Burns Rally. On. The. Hardest. Map.

But why on god’s fucking earth would you do something like that?

Well, because I could.

But the important bit is why I wanted to. The game is insane to play on keyboards and needless to say I never once survived to the end of the map. Out of ~200 plays. I never once finished.

Wtf, masochist?

No. Through endless repetition and stupid iteration I learned. I learned a whole fucking lot! By the time I got fed up with playing I was habitually achieving mid times several seconds faster than the world record for that stage. Yes, the realistic world record.

*gasp* *shocker*

But I still didn’t finish, so the quest continues.

My point is that this little experience teaches us a lot about life, the universe and everything. Life is a series of insurmountable obstacles on the road to imminent disaster

And that is all. Remember that. Whenever you are failing in life, you’re not failing, you’re learning. That’s what it’s all about. The more you fail the better a person you become, those times you dont’ fail you haven’t learned a single thing. So stop that.

Yesterday I gave a guest talk sort of thing at the Jobfair on my faculty. The point was to perform the function of a live demo for my startup incubator and help them get more startups that way.

My personal point was to get some blokes to go “HEY! I wanna to help with that too!”, which of course did not happen because the audience was mostly electronics and hardware people. But nevertheless, it was a lovely chat.

Although, I noticed a very interesting trend. None of them felt very keen on becoming entrepreneurs while still at uni. They thought it was too hard, that next to classes and studying they don’t really have time to do anything else. Hell, I even got an almostpplause for being such an impressive lad that I can do both AND keep a girlfriend.

But seriously, it’s not hard at all. Just take this week’s Tuesday as an example:

On Tuesday I worked for nine hours, five of which were studying/taking a hard maths exam (I count school as work because it’s my “job”). I went to the playhouse and I watched an episode of House. I also helped my girlfriend prepare a presentation for school.

And I still went to bed by midnight.

See, it’s that fucking hard!

Not only have I never passed as many exams as I have now that I’m also an entrepreneur, I’ve also taken up a new sport (boxing), which takes six hours out of every week.

Sure it’s not all fun and games and many people find it difficult to jam 60 to 70 working hours into every week. But if you think being a student and an entrepreneur is hard, you’re trippin’ man. Seriously.

Just get off yer arse and do it. The television and alcohol can take care of themselves.

Just to help you embrace the herculean task this was: My goal was to make the algorithm’s runtime lower than 1.5 seconds for any realistic data sample. It was taking anywhere from 5 to 20 and even 30 seconds at the time.

So I set off. First some profiling and some tidbits here and there, then tweaking and poking and yanking and scraping code for hours upon hours upon hours.

Nothing, no increase in performance. Nothing even remote to sane behaviour at all. Even though the algorithm was working, my debugging/profiling data wasn’t making any sense.

And I said fuck this shit and went to chillax and rest my mind over Men Who Stare at Goats for two hours.

There were some good laughs and some pretty good chillaxing being done. My I-don’t-know-which-exactly-or-what’s-it-called part of the brain was probably busy processing the afore mentioned problem in the background. Or maybe it wasn’t, who knows.

All I know is that when I came back to the problem I noticed something funky.

HEY THAT FUNCTION ARGUMENT SHOULDN’T BE A FUCKING CONSTANT WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!

Characters 1 and t look a lot alike …

So anyway, long story short. The meta-heuristic that used to take 1500 epochs to do something now takes only ten to do the same thing, but slightly better.

That’s a pretty fucking good improovement right there!

Now the algorithm is constantly taking about a second to do its thing and I’m happy. Pushed it into production where profiling data will be collected of a more varied sample of data to see if all is well.

Chillaxing! It really does work.

A few weeks ago, or was it days, I forget, I stumbled upon a rather fascinating video about living to be a hundred years old and more. But not just sitting around and waiting to die kind of 100+, the kind where at 100 you’re still happily running around, building fences and doing stupid crap most westerners really wouldn’t expect you to do anymore.

Everything in there is fine and good, but the most important bottom line I picked up on was the importance of having an ikigai. It’s all wonderfully explained in the video so I won’t go into what ikigai is, I’d rather say a little bit about what it feels like to discover one’s ikigai. (it doesn’t matter whether you know what it’s called or not, I didn’t for months)

As late as just last Spring my life revolved around going to a school I hated, having a job that was alright but not quite that and occasionally getting together with my girlfriend. I was doing some nifty stuff in the evenings and late at night, but mostly it was just another burden no matter how much I loved it and felt like I believed in it.

Then something changed, I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but it changed. The symptom of this change was that I quit my job and devoted most of my attention to the side-project, which evolved far far far away from what it was back then.

And suddenly much was different. School suddenly seemed interesting and awesome, I started learning exciting new things every day for the first time since being a kid. Getting up in the morning was … well it’s still fucking hard, I’m just not a morning person … but staying up at night was painless as hell. Meh, I won’t pretend like I can describe this, just try it.

Now watch the video, I’m not here to blab, I’m here to make you watch this

This is the first post in the series of How <x> changed my style where I shall talk about tools and events that had a significant impact on my style of doing things. If you happen to like this idea, I would be very happy if you could help it spread like wildfire, because it’s a form of pay-it-forward where we say Thanks for cool stuff.

Some months ago, fuck has it been two? three? four?,

Lounging on the sofa, with my trusty MacBook in lap, shiny logo greeting anyone daring to enter my bubble of deep concentration and flowing code masterpieces.

It’s time like these that I truly love what I do, I know us developers are a fussy bunch and like to get all up in arms over the littlest thing that upsets us. That we love nothing better than to nag about some app or another taking 10 fucking milliseconds too long to open! The travesty!

But fact remains, I love being programmer, despite stupid tests not passing, despite frequent choices not to use testing that end up biting us in the arse, despite always changing design specs, despite all the bugs and all the weird shit and that little typo that brings the whole system to its knees and takes a week to fix …

… heaven really is where your code lies, because code is an expression of one’s self, because code is art and no matter what anyone ever says, I will continue to see myself more as a poet than an engineer.

For an utter age now I have been trying to read proper literature more often. There’s a pile of books on my desk, all shiny and new, but unfortunately barely even leafed through. Just waiting patiently and asking me to please give them a read, are they bad books, perhaps they’re too fat? No you’re not fat book honey, I’m just busy.

Two days ago I said, fuck it, this situation needs to be resolved, I used to read a lot, I love reading, so what’s the problem?

As it turns out the problem is that starting is hard, isn’t that always the problem? Beginnings are always hard, sometimes it’s hard even to start going to bed or, hell, start having sex (and I don’t mean when you’re a virgin, I mean on a daily basis). But there was this other problem, I still didn’t have a lot of time.

And so I came up with the concept of 20 minutes a day. Twenty minutes might seem like a lot of time at first, but think about it. 20 minutes is the kind of time you waste walking to school, going to the post office, hell, just waiting for risotto to cook takes around 20 minutes. It’s NOTHING!

Everyone’s got 20 minutes of free time in any given day.

Yeah so everyone’s got twenty minutes, obviously that’s so little time you can’t do anything with it. WRONG! You absolutely positively can do a lot of valuable stuff with that time. For instance you could read ten pages of Dickens, yes Dickens of all things, it reads slow, but in 20 minutes a lot can be done. Or you could devote 20 minutes of unadulterated attention to your children if you’ve got any, or your pets. Or you could spend the 20 minutes getting through your RSS feeds (it’s doable), or do some Pilates like you’ve been wanting to for years.

The thing is you just gotta get off your fucking lazy arse and DO IT! Go on, take 20 minutes out of your busy day and do something for yourself.