Hai guise, long time no funky and interesting posting around here.

That’s all about to change.

‘Cause I’ve got something incredibly awesome and silly to tell all y’all.

Remember Pure Pwnage? That show about a gaming dude called Jeremy otherwise known as teh_pwnerer who is followed around by his noob brother Kyle and they make a show?

Yeah that one, the best fucking internet show ever devised by man. I loved that damn thing!

But then it sort of died, with T-Bone’s crash and everything. It also just so happened to jump the shark a little bit even before then. It was much awesomer when everyone still believed Jeremy was Jeremy and Kyle was Kyle and so on. Seriously, it looked totally legit.

Thing was, once they published that they were professionals, alright, doesn’t hurt the show and Jeremy was still a pretty heavy gamer IRL anyway. I mean they had to be to know that many jokes about games. Thing was, they suddenly felt the freedom of not having to be constrained by reality and it degraded the quality a bit.

BUT NO MATTER!

Because NOW, oh yeas, yes!, NOW they’re back! And.

it.

is.

fucking.

awesome!

They finally managed to become a proper TV show so the quality of everything is a bit better, but they’ve retained the good old format of behind-the-camera Kyle and Jeremy his brother and so on. I watched the season premiere last night and I recommend anyone and everyone who’s ever played a video game to go download it and give it a good watch.

Unfortunately, yeah, with becoming more proper they’ve also become moronic about copyright. In the old days you could just go to their site and watch it anywhere in the world. They had a huge worldwide fanbase and they really really took care of us fans methinks. Now you can only watch it from Canada and US or something. A huge waste.

They basically threw away the one thing that made them really popular and successful – openness. But oh well, at least there’s piratebay and such.

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Tags: Canada, Games, intrigues, life, Pure Pwnage

Sometimes when I’m out and about and not being careful about my clothing my penis slips out.

No wait that’s not right. My linguistic geek slips out.

Yeah, that one! Linguistic geekdom! All over the place! Like a vulgar Andy Warhol rip off painted on a pornstar’s fake boobs.

So last time that happened it was because I stumbled upon something called a Slovianski Jezik, which is apparently something not unlike an Esperanto exclusively for slavic languages.

Of course I went full monty on it and was all like “Omigosh omigosh this is liek SO brilliant yeah!?” in my best cockney accent impersonation.

But the thing is that, all joking aside, us slavs are in dire need of a language such as this. The most painful thing we have to deal with is that already, as it is, in our natural state, it’s almost like we were talking dialects of the same language. Well not really, but still, there are many many similarities.

Like I’ve read once that Slavic languages are the only family of languages in the world where speakers talking to one another feel like the other person should be understandable, but has such a horrible speech impediment that they just can’t quite make them out. Combined with regional differences in vocabulary and you’re in a fucked up situation where you instinctively feel like you should be able to converse normally …

… but just can’t.

For example I went to Prague last week. When there I could almost understand everything I saw in written language and could understand something like 50% of the things I was told. 70% when I tried really hard.

But as soon as I tried to do some proper communication there was a big fail and we were all forced to default back to English, which is just horrible. Come on, a Slovenian and a Czech conversing in a stupid germanic language. EW!

That’s where Slovianski comes in. It is specifically designed to be instantly and intuitively intelligible to anyone who understands slavic languages, more specifically, anyone who is a Slav. You can try this on the Slovianski language front page

Personally I can make out just about everything it says. Even when a word is missing I can very simply understand it from the context.

This is without ever having learnt any other Slavic languages than Slovene and I guess I learned some Serbocroatian by ear simply from … well those who know why know, the rest don’t really have to know.

I think every Slav out there should learn this language, I sure know I want to. It looks easy enough anyway.

Tags: intrigues, Linguistics, Slavic languages, Slovene language

This is a howto that might come in handy to some people, but mostly I just want to document how I poked around some very angry django dragons and created something marvelous. There are also people on twitter who were wondering what the fuck I was doing.

So let’s start by describing the problem. We have a base user model named pUser (yes stupid naming convention) that is tied to a cookie, which holds an id. These users are then tied to a number of different API accounts. In my case it is Delicious, Twitter and Facebook. The user_id is also used to tie a bunch of meta data in different other models to them.

The problem is that we do not want to trouble users with a special login for our service. But they are using different computers and browsers, so the same physical user can have multiple user id’s.

However through their Delicious et al. credentials we can tie them back together into a single entity. But we do not want to trouble the rest of the code with this detail, it should just work seamlessly because otherwise we’d be forced to introduce checking for this stuff at about 50 different places in the project.

My approach to solving this goes as follows; at the end will be the three tests that indicate that the solution is valid. A hardcore test through the actual UI also confirmed that everything works.

Funky geek stuff follows, you have been warned

First we introduce a model that connects different user id’s to the main user (i.e. the first id said user was given)

class UserNormalisation(models.Model):
	main_id = models.IntegerField()
	sub_id = models.IntegerField()
 
	class Meta:
		unique_together = ("main_id", "sub_id")

Then we give our Delicious model a ModelManager that will perform duplicity checking and tie different users together as needed.

class DeliciousManager(models.Manager):
	def create(self, **kwargs):
		try:
			old = Delicious.objects.get(username=kwargs['username'])
			new = super(DeliciousManager, self).create(**kwargs)
			try:
				UserNormalisation(main_id = old.user.id,
						  sub_id = new.user.id).save()
			except IntegrityError:
				pass
			new.delete()
			return old
		except Delicious.DoesNotExist:
			return super(DeliciousManager, self).create(**kwargs)
 
class Delicious(models.Model):
	user = models.ForeignKey( pUser )
	username = models.CharField( max_length=255 )
	password = models.CharField( max_length=255 )
	isScrobbled = models.BooleanField( default=False )
 
	objects = DeliciousManager()

Basically when the createfunction is called it checks whether a Delicious model with the same username already exists and if it does, then a row is added to the UserNormalisation table to tie the two user id’s together.

And here’s the real magic, the changes we did to the pUser model.

class pUserManager(models.Manager):
	def get(self, **kwargs):
		user = super(pUserManager, self).get(**kwargs)
		try:
			id = UserNormalisation.objects.get(sub_id=user.id).main_id
			user = super(pUserManager, self).get(id=id)
		except UserNormalisation.DoesNotExist:
			pass
		return user
 
class pUser(models.Model):
	username = models.CharField( max_length=50 )
	password = models.CharField( max_length=255 )
	creation = models.DateTimeField( auto_now=True )
 
	objects = pUserManager()
 
	def __init__(self, *args, **kwargs):
		super(pUser, self).__init__(*args, **kwargs)
		try:
			id = UserNormalisation.objects.get(sub_id=self.id).main_id
			self.id = id
 
		except UserNormalisation.DoesNotExist:
			pass

The pUserManager should have a few more functions that do essentially the same thing for other operations (filter comes to mind). Essentially whenever a pUser is fetched from the db the manager will return the real user as per the UserNormalisation model.

Another trick that makes this work seamlessly even when used as a connecting model (primary key for instance) in a different table is that __init__ function. What I’ve discovered is that there it’s enough to just change the user’s id in place and everything will work.

Here are the tests that confirm all of this funky stuff actually performs as expected

	def test_normalisation(self):
		user = pUser(username="test", password="test")
		user.save()
 
		user2 = pUser(username="test2", password="test")
		user2.save()
 
		norm = UserNormalisation(main_id=user.id, sub_id=user2.id)
		norm.save()
 
		fixture = pUser.objects.get(id=user2.id)
		self.assertEquals( fixture.id, user.id )
 
	def test_normalisation2(self):
		user = pUser()
		user.save()
		user2 = pUser()
		user2.save()
 
		user.delicious_set.create(username="test", password="test")
		fixture = user2.delicious_set.create(username="test", password="test")
 
		self.assertEquals( fixture.user.id, user.id )
		self.assertEquals( UserNormalisation.objects.get(sub_id=user2.id).main_id, user.id )
		self.assertEquals( fixture.user, user )
 
	def test_normalisation3(self):
		user = pUser()
		user.save()
		user2 = pUser()
		user2.save()
 
		user.delicious_set.create(username="test", password="test")
		fixture = user2.delicious_set.create(username="test", password="test")
 
		norm = UserNormalisation.objects.all()
 
		Concepts.relate(user=user2, concept1="tag1", concept2="tag2")
		relation = ConceptRelation.objects.filter(user=user2, concept1="tag1")[0]
		self.assertEquals( relation.user.id, user.id )
		self.assertEquals( relation.user, user )

Take special note to the latter two examples. In test_normalisation2 you can see that when a delicious_set is created for user2, the two users become the same thing because both we’re using the same delicious username both times. Something similar happens in test_normalisation3, but there we see that creating a ConceptRelation for user2 actually creates it for the first user because they both behave as if they were the original user.

Tags: django, food for thought, intrigues, Programming, python

This whole week I’ve been doing a lot of maths studying. Things like parametric curves, LaGrange theorems and funky functional sequences.

Naturally I’ve developed a bit of a love for pretty mathematical objects, so I wanted to share some with you.

1. Our first contestant is the cardioid. She’s a bit chubby on the sides but has a heart of gold.

2. The second contestant is an implicit heart and was contributed by a bloke on Facebook whom I believe has had this saved somewhere because it would be just mindblowing if he even know it from heart, let alone could create it.

3. This little nugget followed from my experimentation with parameters of a curve I don’t know the name of … it’s a flower if you haven’t noticed.

4. The Butterfly Curve is well known in some circles, but I found it by stumbling around wikipedia like a drunken madman

5. There are likely to be other contestants I have yet to discover.

So, which curve do you think is the most beautifulest mathematical construct?

Tags: Butterfly Curve, intrigues, Mathematics

Lately we’ve been hearing a lot, and I mean a bloody metric shitload, of rumours, speculation and other fun things about the soon-to-be-announced Apple tablet. You know how those Apple fanboys get, the first time hype started building about this thing was several years ago, but lately it’s been getting soooo pervasive you just knew it was the real deal this time.

Of course after all this hype the features I expected were:

• the casing is made of solid gold
• it can make me a sandwich
• it brings coffee
• it fits in my pocket
• it is very very useful
• it can wipe my arse after I take a dump
• it can fly me to the moon and back
• it works like The Guide mk.2 (If you don’t know what this means you should be ashamed of yourself)

So let’s see what Apple gave us:

• oversized iPhone that can’t make calls

Errr … what!? Seriously Apple? Seriously? This!? Really!? We’re doing this again!?

Ok look, I love Apple, hell I even want an iPhone. And I really believe the devices they create are marvelous pieces of technology that work very well. But this fucking piece of crap is the biggest technological let-down I have ever had the displeasure of seeing.

I mean seriously, what the fuck was Apple smoking when they designed this thing? They’re supposed to be this sooper innovative company performing feats of magic right before our eyes, but instead, they take all the old technology, add nothing of the new, and call it the next big awesomest thing.

Fuck off Apple. Call me when you start making useful and exciting stuff again.

At least with the Newton it was marvelous technology that was too far ahead of its time, the iPad is just boring, mundane and boring.

Oh and you can tell they know it’s boring and useless because it’s PRICED THE SAME AS THEIR OLD PRODUCT!

Tags: Apple, food for thought, Handhelds, intrigues, IPhone, life, Steve Jobs, Technology

Size matters!

But obviously that’s a very lame argument so let’s work it out a bit.

Everybody knows that when it comes to impregnating homo sapienatic females any and all but the weirdest of male homo sapienatic instruments will do. It can be wide, it can be small, it can be whatever. As long as it’s longer than 5 inches you’re good and obviously since you’re here and we have this thing called evolution and inherited traits, chances are your phallic instrument is longer than 5 inches mister.

And 5 inches is quite alright, I wouldn’t want a 5 inch knife in my back …

But homo sapiens are smart cookies and they needed something more out of sex. This thing called an endorphinal high, we like drugs maaan, because after all, if sex would hurt nobody would do it and then we’d all be fucked. Not to mention that’s no fun at all.

So most of the time when a homo sapiens female and a homo sapiens male get together it isn’t to make little hobbits, it’s to make fun and create natural occuring brain drugs. Woo.

This however introduces a problem, the lukewarm hole most females sport is very stretchy and the more fun it’s having the more it stretches. The damn thing does not in the least care about what you’re putting inside, it just wants more and more and more and it gets bigger and bigger. Then the lady stops getting pleasure because she can’t feel anything.

Hell, there’s very little friction left!

What do? Well obviously you put a bigger instrument into the hands of the master male homo sapiens so that he could pleasure the female better. Problem solved!

By the by, many animal species have tricks to make the female more … uhm … willing. Like cats have spikes on their instruments and ducks have a spiral penis! Wow, amazing, shocker!

Ok so no bitching about “Size doesn’t matter, it’s how you use it” Sod off with those, size, in humans, is about 80% of the equation when it comes to pleasurable activities of the sort.

Therein lies the problem. The more the woman wants to have fun, the bigger instrument she needs. But how can you tell who’s got a big instrument when the damn bastards keep it neatly tucked away in their garment?

Confidence!

The more confidence a male sports the bigger their schlong! The mechanism for how big schlong == big confidence is probably self-evident so let’s leave it at this. The reason why bigger schlong equals bigger confidence is that lasses need a heuristic for finding bigger pleasure.

Tags: Adult, advice, Biology, Evolution, food for thought, Human, intrigues, Male, Species

After tonight’s midterm I simply couldn’t resist driving around and about Ljubljana in this magnificent snowy weather we’re having. It’s very rare to get a chance to drive in conditions where everyone is nice and calm. Nobody honks at you, nobody tries to swerve around you and do stupid things, nobody is in a hurry. It’s just fucking awesome!

Not to mention the snow and the occasional drift around a corner! Orgasmic! Oh!

Although winter services could be a little more vigilant, I got thrown all over the place driving through tracks others made. There was snow up to 20 centimeters deep someplaces! On main roads!!

Anyway, had fun, was awesome, got stuck in the snow on the parking lot at home. That was a big lol, but a surprisingly large amount of people I don’t know decided to be helpful and we got the car into a parking space in no time.

Tags: intrigues, life, Snow, Weather