Swizec Teller - a geek with a hatswizec.com

    Apple pulls another Newton with the iPad

    Lately we've been hearing a lot, and I mean a bloody metric shitload, of rumours, speculation and other fun things about the soon-to-be-announced Apple tablet. You know how those Apple fanboys get, the first time hype started building about this thing was several years ago, but lately it's been getting soooo pervasive you just knew it was the real deal this time.

    Of course after all this hype the features I expected were:

    • the casing is made of solid gold
    • it can make me a sandwich
    • it brings coffee
    • it fits in my pocket
    • it is very very useful
    • it can wipe my arse after I take a dump
    • it can fly me to the moon and back
    • it works like The Guide mk.2 (If you don't know what this means you should be ashamed of yourself)

    So let's see what Apple gave us:

    • oversized iPhone that can't make calls

    Errr ... what!? Seriously Apple? Seriously? This!? Really!? We're doing this again!?

    Ok look, I love Apple, hell I even want an iPhone. And I really believe the devices they create are marvelous pieces of technology that work very well. But this fucking piece of crap is the biggest technological let-down I have ever had the displeasure of seeing.

    I mean seriously, what the fuck was Apple smoking when they designed this thing? They're supposed to be this sooper innovative company performing feats of magic right before our eyes, but instead, they take all the old technology, add nothing of the new, and call it the next big awesomest thing.

    Fuck off Apple. Call me when you start making useful and exciting stuff again.

    At least with the Newton it was marvelous technology that was too far ahead of its time, the iPad is just boring, mundane and boring.

    Oh and you can tell they know it's boring and useless because it's PRICED THE SAME AS THEIR OLD PRODUCT!

    Reblog this post [with Zemanta]

    Did you enjoy this article?

    Published on January 27th, 2010 in Apple, food for thought, Handhelds, intrigues, IPhone, life, Steve Jobs, Technology, Uncategorized

    Learned something new?
    Want to become an expert?

    Here's how it works 👇

    Leave your email and I'll send you thoughtfully written emails every week about React, JavaScript, and your career. Lessons learned over 20 years in the industry working with companies ranging from tiny startups to Fortune5 behemoths.

    Join Swizec's Newsletter

    And get thoughtful letters 💌 on mindsets, tactics, and technical skills for your career. Real lessons from building production software. No bullshit.

    "Man, love your simple writing! Yours is the only newsletter I open and only blog that I give a fuck to read & scroll till the end. And wow always take away lessons with me. Inspiring! And very relatable. 👌"

    ~ Ashish Kumar

    Join over 14,000 engineers just like you already improving their careers with my letters, workshops, courses, and talks. ✌️

    Have a burning question that you think I can answer? I don't have all of the answers, but I have some! Hit me up on twitter or book a 30min ama for in-depth help.

    Ready to Stop copy pasting D3 examples and create data visualizations of your own?  Learn how to build scalable dataviz components your whole team can understand with React for Data Visualization

    Curious about Serverless and the modern backend? Check out Serverless Handbook, modern backend for the frontend engineer.

    Ready to learn how it all fits together and build a modern webapp from scratch? Learn how to launch a webapp and make your first 💰 on the side with ServerlessReact.Dev

    Want to brush up on your modern JavaScript syntax? Check out my interactive cheatsheet: es6cheatsheet.com

    By the way, just in case no one has told you it yet today: I love and appreciate you for who you are ❤️

    Created bySwizecwith ❤️